I belong to a little group of players who are middling-good to inexpert. New people find it very helpful to look at the song and listen while others play it. There's a feedback mechanism between your eyes and ears which helps a lot.

So if you can find even one trained person who is willing to play some tunes with you and coach you. It really helps. (By trained, I mean someone who plays an instrument well, for example, someone who was in a high-school orchestra.)

For short notes, we rely lot on a method of counting which many piano teachers use for their students. For example, 8 - eighth notes (common in a reel) are "henrietta-henrietta." Use your metronome and make sure that the "hen" and then the "et" are said on a click.

If the measure has a G chord and a D chord in it, say G-ri-ett-a, D-ri-et-ta, as you hit the G and D chords.

A 6/8 song (jig) goes 1-lo-lly, 2-lo-lly. Or say to yourself, G-lo-lly, D-lolly.

A measure in 3/4 is "wonderful." Use your metronome and make sure you are saying one syllable per click. Oftentimes a waltz has an energetic section where each measure is full of eighth notes. Then we say "henrietta evans." It just seems to come easier than 1+2+3+. After all, the speech centers in our brains get much more practice in life than our counting centers.

We have a member who is an incredible guitarist, yet she was entirely self-taught. When she first came, she couldn't play along because she had no idea where we were in the music. So we taught her this system, and she was in the groove almost immediately. She is still with us after six or seven years.

Hope this helps.