The second verse is a joke about Jonah and the whale but I'm missing a word or two...

2. A chap named mister Jonah who was ill in bed for days,
He'd got a whalebone down his neck throughout ...
They tried him with emetics and a stomach pump you see,
But nothing seemed to answer so they sent him round to me.

I'm Shelley! good old Doctor Shelley!
He said, "Oh, doctor, do be quick, or I shall go right up the stick."
I dropped my tongs right down his throat into his Dardanelly,
Turned old Jonah inside out. Good old Doctor Shelley!

To me the last line of 3 sounds like 'She's twisted her bazooka and she cannot get it back."' ?!?!?!?!

The missing bit in following section is related to the joke of laying hard boiled eggs as he:

Gave her boiling water and some chloroform so smelly.

In 4 he sings:

But as his back was narrow I shoved in a slice of pork.

I'm sure the last section, right after 'fire' he mentions crackling, as in pork crackling, but I can't make it all out.

I also hear 'thruppence' instead of tuppence in the fist verse but am not 100%.

I hope my bits help you to figure out the rest and that you will share your thoughts as I'm a huge fan of Harry Champion.

cheerz

joolz