I have searched for this in the DT but could not find it:


THE ENGLISHMAN'S SPLENDID

The blame for the state of this nation of ours,
Can rest on the heads of three unfriendly powers,
Examine the Irishman, Welshman or Scot
You'll find he's a bounder as likely or not.
But the Englishman's splendid, the Englishman's nice.
And worth all the others at double the price.

The Scotsman is mean as we're all well aware,
He's huge and he's bony and covered in hair,
He eats salted porridge and tosses huge trees,
And wear pretty dresses to show off his knees.
But the Englishman's splendid, the Englishman's nice.
And worth all the others at double the price.

The Welshman is sneaky he cheats when he can,
He's little and dark more monkey than man,
He lives underground with a light on his hat,
And sings far too loud, far too often and flat.
But the Englishman's splendid, the Englishman's nice.
And worth all the others at double the price.

The Irishman now our contempt is beneath,
He sleeps in his boots and lies in his teeth,
He blows up policemen or so I have heard,
And blames it on Cromwell and William the third
But the Englishman's splendid, the Englishman's nice.
And worth all the others at double the price.

And as for this market you cannot say much,
For the likes of the Belgians, the Danes or the Dutch,
The French and Italians eat garlic in bed,
A German's a German and that's enough said.
But the Englishman's splendid, the Englishman's nice.
And worth all the others at double the price.

And as for the Colonies, well they're just the same,
Simply no notion of playing the game.
They argue with umpires and cheer when they've won,
And practice beforehand which spoils all the fun.
But the Englishman's splendid, the Englishman's good,
And modest, and gentle, and misunderstood.


The tune is similar to the Ould Orange Flute