I'm a sacristan with the Romans. Our parish was new in 2005, and nobody knew what a sacristan was. Now, the stereotypical Catholic sacristan is a fussy, mousy eunuch; and I had no desire to fit that model. So...I reinvented the role into a sort of concierge. I make sure everybody feels happy and welcome, anticipate and resolve problems before they happen, and make sure all the volunteers show up and all the jobs are done. My job often involves heavy-duty electronics, plumbing, and custodial work. I maintain the illusion that I know everything because I had eight years of seminary training, and that keeps everybody happy.

Whether you believe in transubstantiation or hold to other interpretations of the Lord's Supper, the consecrated bread and wine used in Eucharist are sacred, and should be so. If you lose the sense of the sacred in ritual (religious or otherwise), then the ritual becomes empty and routine. Everything connected to the ritual should be treated as important, because it conveys an important meaning. This also should apply to graduation ceremonies and even birthday parties. Otherwise, these rituals lose their meaning.

We do the initial washing of chalices, corporals, and purificators in a sink called a sacrarium - it's just a plain sink with a cover, and it drains to the ground instead of into the sewage system. Then the obsessive-compulsive ladies of the Altar Society take the cloths home and launder them in their own washing machines.

It's hard to get red wine stains out of white linens. There are some enzyme soaks that do a pretty good job, though. I tried to talk our priest into switching from red to amber-colored wine to reduce the stains, but he wouldn't buy that. I was raised in Wisconsin with amber wine, he in Ireland with red wine. But the ladies of the Altar Society do a good job and keep him happy, so bless them for that.

Eliza, if you had done what you did in MY church, I would have thanked you profusely and offered to buy you a beer. So, not to worry.

-Joe-