You have my sympathy. Broken ribs hurt. So, you up for a few laughs?

I'll take your silence as a yes.


Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked. 'It's not unusual' he replied.


Slept like a log last night........ Woke up in the fireplace.


I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite......... one jar.


I backed a horse last week at ten to one. It came in at quarter past four.