In my moral world something is wrong if it hurts another person and is done knowing that it hurts another person. So if your partner doesn't mind then its ok, but if you insist on using it even though you know your partner gets very upset by it, then you might be doing something wrong.

Also, although some women in the porn industry have made a free choice to be there, many others got there by a very difficult path. Abuse in childhood, leading to prostitution and earning a living by pornography, because they think its all they are worth. If you could see the life history of the person you were looking at, then sometimes you might not get so turned on.

Bagpuss