Dunno how much footie you watch, Jack, but you'll see players deliberately stamping on other players when they're down, cynical "professional" fouls to stop direct scoring chances, elbows thrust into faces and double-footed studs-up tackles that are absolutely not accidental. In the old days and in lower leagues you get away with it. With 25 video cameras all the field in a big game you're going to get seen, even if the ref misses it.

Ah, did someone just mention the sublime Tom Finney, still going strong in his 90s...the Preston Plumber... Was he the greatest of all time, or was that my boyhood hero Jimmy McIlroy of Burnley? Now there's a man who could have been a role model, had there been such a thing!