Father, looking at son's report card: "You only got a C in History? Why, I always got A's in history when I was your age!"

Son:"Well, there wasn't nearly as much OF it back then!"

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At a shop where I was working, the radio was playing "Scarbourough Fair".. I wondered aloud what station was playing it.

"Oh," said one the 20 somethings, "that's an 'oldies' station, that song is by Simon & Garfunkel"

I told them it was 'slightly' older than that...like by several hundred years. They didn't believe me till I brought in a book with several versions.