The prophet David Jones will engineer the winning of the premier league silly! Using manna from heaven (dodgy money from Mandaric.) Although I am sure that after the first rapture (promotion from the championship) the demigod Mandaric will drop him like a ton of spuds and fetch his co defendent Harry Rednapp in.

Can I take this opportunity to remind parishioners that the next church service will be held at 3.00 pm on Saturday 3 August away at QPR.

Grace and peace.