"The Rules for Driving in New York City"

1) When on a one way street, stay to the right
to allow oncoming traffic to pass.

2) Never, ever, stop for a pedestrian unless
he flings himself under the wheels of your car.

3) The first parking space you see will be the
last parking space you see. Grab it.

4) Never get in the way of a car that needs
extensive body work.

5) Always look both ways when running a red
light.