IF I EVER GET A JOB AGAIN
Words by Samuel Lewis, music by Abel Baer.
As recorded by Dick Robertson and His Band, 1933.

If I ever get a job again,
I will never be a snob again.
I'll live within my means,
Carry a dollar in my jeans,
If I ever get a job again.

If I ever get a break again,
Brother, what I'll do to steak again!
No turning out the light,
Bidding my appetite goodnight,
If I ever get a break again.

I'll get two rooms and a kitchenette,
Furnished comfortably.
With two rooms and a kitchenette,
I'll get a sweet somebody to move in with me.

If I ever get a job again,
I know that two hearts will throb again.
She told me with her eyes
We'll be rehearsing lullabies
If I ever get a job again.

If I ever get a job again,
I will never be a snob again.
I'm through with stocks and bonds.
I'd rather spend it all on blondes,
If I ever get a job again.

If I ever get my pay again,
I'll save it for a rainy day again,
But let me tell you, Bud,
I'm gonna save up for a flood
If I ever get my pay again.

I'll get two suits and an overcoat,
Like a millionaire—
Just two suits and an overcoat,
And then when things get better, I'll buy underwear!

If I ever get a job again,
With my old friends I'll hobnob again.
What fun it will be
Saying, "Just have one more on me,"
If I ever get a job again.