BUMPER-STICKER WITNESS Music & Lyrics By Bryan Sirchio, Crosswind Music, 1995. All Rights Reserved. As sung by Bryan Sirchio on "Artist's Hand" (1995)
1. I was driving down the interstate just minding my own business When moving slow in the left-hand lane was a '57 Plymouth. I flashed my lights to get her over to the right, but she would not move, and then I knew That this was no run-of-the-mill mobile.
2. As I pulled up close I saw that entire car was covered With umpteen zillion bumper stickers, one next to the other, And every single sticker was a message for a sinner, And then I realized I'd pulled up behind—
CHORUS: A bumper-sticker witness. She's a bumper-sticker witness, yeah, And she drives it to the limit for the Lord. She's got a holy-rollin' Plymouth, And that woman's zeal is driven. She's a bumper-sticker witness for the Lord.
3. (I started reading) Jesus saves; His pain, your gain; I found it, Praise the Lord! The God I worship is not dead; I'm sorry to hear about yours. And Jesus Christ is tough as nails, and he was dyin' for you to meet him, And may your words be sweet and tender, 'cause tomorrow you might just eat 'em. CHORUS
BRIDGE: If I did not know the Lord, I would not get caught dead. Oh, have a little patience; God's not through with me yet. One life to live will soon be past. Only what we do in Christ will last. And: Warning, in case of rapture, this car will crash!
4. When it seems there's no way out, then let the Savior in. And make the Lord your captain and your team will always win. She's got her foot on the rock and her name on the roll, And she tunes her AM radio to the DJ of her dreams—"Paul Harvey—good day!" CHORUS
5. Well, I must admit these bumper stickers used to make me snicker, But these cranking Christianese machines, well, just might be saving sinners, And maybe when we reach those pearly gates we'll be surprised To find that heaven's filled with folks who once pulled up behind—CHORUS