"Dormitory Rules"

On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the
students, pointing out some of the rules.

"The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male
students, so too the male dormitory to the female students.
Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $50 the first
time. Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time
will be fined $150. Being caught a third time will incur a hefty
fine of $500.

"Are there any questions?"

At this, a male student in the crowd inquired, "Err... How
much for a season pass?"

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"The Stork"

Two storks are sitting in their nest: a father stork and baby
stork. Baby stork is crying and crying, and father stork is
trying to calm him, "Don't worry, son. Your mother will
come back. She's only bringing people babies and making
them happy."

The next night, it's father's turn to do the job. Mother and son
are sitting in the nest, son is crying, and mother is saying,
"Son, your father will be back as soon as possible, but now
he's bringing joy to new mommies and daddies."

A few days later, the stork parents are desperate. Their son
is absent from the nest all night! Shortly before dawn, he
returns, and the parents ask him where he's been all night.
Says the baby stork, "Nowhere in particular. Just scaring the
hell out of college students!"