Here's "On the Club". It was written by Brian Berrington who used to sing at the Stoke Folk Club in the 1960s. I've transcribed the words from Brian's singing on the "Stoke Folk" record.


Oh my name is Albert Twemlow and I come from Boslem Tine
Me fayther is a mould runner, me brother's dine a mine
Me sister works at Doulton's and me mother's in a pub
But I meself don't work at all, I'm always on the club.

CH:        Tunstall, Boslem, Hanley, Stoke
        Fenton, Longton through the smoke.

One day before I left the school me teacher said "Hey you,
You'll have to get a thinking lad what you are gonna do.
You conna stay at school no more, you wunna gerra sub."
"That's owrate duck," I says to her, "I'm going go on the club."


I thought I'd get a job of work with the good old PMT*
Conducting** on a 'decker bus as went to Bentilee.
A fat old woman says to me "Where can I put me stub?"
And when the judge had tried me case, I was back on the club.


I thought as I'd try me hand at the window cleaning trade
With me barrow and me chammy cloth I thought as I was made
While cleaning Wedgwood's windows I give a special rub
Then I stepped back to admire me work and I was on the club


I met a woman in a bar, I axed her what her did
Her said her stripped for jiggerers and earned just on six quid
I dosed her up with gin and port and when we left that pub
I axed her if her'd strip for me and now her's in the club.


So come all you likely pott'ry lads as have just heard me tale
I hope you'll tak me good advice, you'll find it wunner fail
Just tell the doc you've strained your back, ax for some Johnson's rub
Mak sure he signs upon the lines and you'll be on the club.



*PMT = Potteries Motor Traction, the original Potteries bus company.

**Those were the days, when buses had conductors!


Cheers
Jeff Parton