nutty, you might want to check my response to the "Bronchitis" thread. As I said there, maybe if we all started calling it "nicotine addiction" instead of smoking, it might increase our consciousness of what it's all about. It's too easy to shrug and act embarrassed and say things like, 'yeah, I'm I smoker," and do nothing to change. I've known a number of heroin and cocaine addicts who were in recovery from those substances who still "couldn't" quit nicotine. Most of them would tell you it's as tough an addiction as they'd ver encountered. Best of luck. You're not alone.