Melani don't be put off, one person in a full room is causing me grief, and the rest are the nicest most helpful people I have come across. I've read everything in the thread and the response is overwhelming, when I posted it before going out the other day I was expecting lots of "grow up" messages
In answer to some of the points, the playing of Michael McGoldrick made me want to play in the first place, the style, speed and precision of his playing is still way beyond my reach. I used a keyless wooden D flute in the pub though I have a secondhand boehm flute as well, I have already abandoned most of the classical style I was taught
I never intended to play at all (to scared), quite happy just listening and trying to take the tunes in, then one night a man came in with a beautiful old flute ( an instrument he doesn't play but had been given ) and wanted to know if anyone would play it for him. A few more drinks later and someone asked me to play something so I grasped the nettle, borrowed his flute and had a go. Then once you have taken that step its hard to fade back into the wallpaper, and quite rightly the people who have been entertaining you for weeks want some payback. The solo part came by accident, I haven't yet learned the sets they play though I know some of the tunes. I would much rather play as part of the group in future, the sound of everything together (even all in time sometimes!) is a rare experience, I can play solo anytime while practicing
Having thought about this a bit more it is obvious that the guy wants to help but has no social skills. The other week he went on and on about someone else at the session having an inferior whistle (susato) and the next week caught sight of my flute, asked to look at it, and then handed it back commenting that XXXX (a different, more expensive manufacturer) was not charging enough for his flutes! Before this he tried playing it and the produced the most dreadful sounds, wish I had laughed now

My decision is to practice more, learn and join in with the sets and have a good time. The annoying bloke mainly plays solo so I won't be in his territory.
I do value all advice but I have listened to his mantra many times, "you have to learn rolls first before learning the tunes..." , he just goes on and on, and it is mainly an excuse for him to have me as a captive audience to listen to his repertoire. I am also going to try and find me a teacher who plays irish flute tunes, there is one locally, that way any problems with my playing can be ironed out and I can just tell ***** that I am getting lessons elsewhere

Thanks everyone and good luck Melani