Dandelion Tensions Escalate

Today, whilst engaging my neighbour in a friendly conversation, he strode into my yard and killed a dandelion. He actually bent over and ripped it from it's mother. Dead. Murdered before my eyes. I was shocked. And it was on the part of my lawn that he 'over sprays' his cancer causing crap on.

I 'asked', "You killed one of my pretty yellow flowers?

"Yes. God damned bastard weed."

"Take it home. You can eat almost all of it."

"I wouldn't eat that shit."

"Well, I am gonna try to mow the lawns this evening if my back holds out."

He proceeded to lecture me on the proper time of day to mow my lawn so I could kill the maximum amount of dandelions. "Do it the afternoon when they are standing up… before they lay down as dark approaches."

Oh, it's on. Fire a shot across my bow when I have a huge green Grass Monkey with full shot? He's got herbicides but I got Mom on my side. I am gonna send so many Dandy Squadron Paratroopers his way that his window screens are gonna choke up with those who will sacrifice themselves for the sake of their Mom. Mow at high sun? Mow at eve? No. No mow bullshit… it's on.