As there appears to be irreconcilable differences, I propose the Traditional MOAB duel to sort things out. At dawn or some time after you awaken, bathe, brush your teeth, have breakfast, etc., you go to an open field or an appropriate street (although an fog-shrouded alley lined with live oaks dripping Spanish moss is best) and propel a projectile* in the direction of Pocatello, Idaho (don't do this somewhere where you might hit a house or another person or anything -- safety counts!). If you don't know the correct direction I suggest a map and a compass.

For my part, I shall return to Pocatello on the 27th, and on July 28th, as early as possible, I shall propel something in the direction of Moncton, New Brunswick.

Afterwards, our wounds bound by the surgeon, we retire to a convivial glass or twelve in a quaint old pub. In these situations even Budweiser is acceptable.

My attorneys, should you wish to contact them, is the old and prestigious firm of Rubor, Tumor, Dolor, and Calor.




*Bullets, nerf balls, rocks, arrows, crossbow bolts, cannon balls, cambers, banjos, death rays, frisbees, ICBMs, icy BMs, stale donuts from Tim's, moldy Spudnuts, locomotives, aspersions, kind words, rotten potatoes, insults, spears, javelins, dead horses, prayers, imprecations, or anything else that can be propelled. Just be careful and don't strain yourself -- be safe out there!