Flattop, I had been rather worried about your post-Christmas depression, but now I am deeply concerned! This latest clumsy attempt to end it all fortunately did not succeed. But...what if you had, in your struggles to extricate yourself from the porcelain fixture, happened to place your hand on the flush handle, thus activating the infernal device. Imagine the horror of it! A last view of the world (albeit in a darkened room, so not much of a view at that) spinning round and round frenetically, then a hideous "GALOOOOONK!" sound as you vanished forever from our world. You probably wouldn't have been missed for weeks.

Hell, make that months...

I hope you have come to your senses. Stay away from the bathroom, and don't unplug the phone. Your friends are just a call away. :-)

- LH