I was asked if I sang this, so I thought I'd learn it. I've heard all the variations above, but as I'm not a Londoner and no longer sing to an English audience (or ANY audience, usually) I went back to the LP I found in an op-shop.

S.H. was a Londoner, despite the accent he usually used in monologues.

On the LP;
The Lion and Albert. (Monologue. A boy gets eaten)
Pick Oop Tha Musket   (Monologue. Just before Battle of Waterloo)
Uppards               (Monologue. Skit on the poem Excelsior)
Albert Comes Back    (Monologue. Boy gets Un-eaten)
Beat the Retreat on Thy Drum. (Monologue. Drummer boy meets Napoleon)
Brahn Boots.          (Monologue. Proper dress for funerals)
Good Old Yorkshire Pudden. (Monologue. About the comestible)
Runcorn Ferry.       (Monologue. Albert and Lancashire parsimony)
With Her Head Tucked Underneath Her Arm. (Song. Above)
Three Ha'pence a Foot. (Monologue. Noah's Ark and stubbornness)
Albert's Birthday.    (Monologue. Albert and Lancashire parsimony)
Old Sam's Party.       (monologue mostly. Sam Small in old age)

I think most of them are on the site 'Make 'Em Laugh', if they aren't and you want one, PM me.