The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #156908   Message #3701231
Posted By: jacqui.c
11-Apr-15 - 02:44 PM
Thread Name: BS: why marriage works
Subject: RE: BS: why marriage works
My parents 'stayed together for the children' and theirs was not a happy marriage, for them, or for the children. I divorced my children's father after four years as the 'sacrament of marriage' had done nothing to stop him having at least two affairs. I raised two children single handed for about ten years, both of whom have become adults to be proud of.

My son never did marry the mother of his child but did not stray outside the relationship. It is probable that his partner may not be able to say the same. That relationship ended when she physically and verbally abused me. He did marry his subsequent partner and I have the best Daughter-in-law possible. My lovely granddaughter is loved and cared for by her father, even though they do not live in the same home.

My daughter is still married to her husband of nearly sixteen years and that has produced my beloved grandson.

I can say that my family has encompassed most of the ways of being together and I can't say that one has the moral advantage over the others. My children are well adjusted adults, their children are bright and well adjusted, in spite of the difference in upbringing. Marriage does not automatically bring about morality and, from my experience, non marriage does not remove either that or good health, either physical or mental.

I don't think that anyone can say that any particular type of relationship will work for everyone. At my fourth attempt I am now in a very good relationship that I think would have worked even if we had not married. Human beings are all different, what works for one won't suit another.