Shame, here's a poem just for you:

A young fellow yclepted Shame McBride
To his big brother Don, how he lied!
He had ne'er touched Don's truck,
Nor rolled it into the muck,
Or had stolen Don's beer on the side.

I hope you enjoy it, if you can find somebody to read it to you. Don't ask that chimp you're shacked up with, because s/he can't read either.