Susan,

I think "curmudgeon" is gender neutral. Condider Dorothy Parker or Fran Libowitz.

Also check out "The Portable Curmudgeon" by John Winokur. and/or his "Reurn of The Portable Curmudgeon"

Modern useage has added the flavor of "big strong marshmallows of adorable goo" inside but the true curmudegeon is a WYSIWYG sort of person. (Sorry, couldn't resist).

Just meet troll in person.

Regards, John