THE HOT DOG SONG
Words by Woody Allen, music by Marvin Hamlisch and Craig Carnelia.
From the musical play "Bullets over Broadway" (2014)
As recorded by Heléne Yorke in the original cast album.

Is there someone here who'd give a girl a hand?
I'm looking for the guy who runs the hot-lunch stand.
He's us'lly here around half-past three,
And I'm a hung-a-ry girl, you see.

They say I'm fickle; that's a fact,
But if I like the service, I might come back.
Tell me: how much is it? I'm willing to pay,
So listen to the words I say:

I want a hot dog for my roll.
I want it hot; I don't want it cold.
Give me a big one; that's what I said.
I want it so it will fit my bread.

I want a hot dog for my roll.
I want it young; I don't want it old.
I sure will be disgusted
If that dog ain't full of mustard.
Don't want an excuse.
It must have lots of juice.
I want a hot dog for my roll.

Now here's a dog that's short and lean.
That ain't the kind o' dog I mean.
Well, here's a dog that's short and fat.
You better show me something better than that.
Well. here's my roll; where's your dog?
Uh-uh, that roll you got would hold half a hog.

Hey! Tell me, can you fill it? Why, yes I can.
I'm known as the champion hot-dog man.
Now here's a hot dog for your roll.
You want it hot; you don't want it cold.
I haven't eaten; it's been a while.
Oh, my dog will lay you in the aisle.

She wants a hot dog for her roll.
She wants it young; she don't want it old.
Don't worry; it won't hurt her.
It's just a friendly frankfurter.

She'll wait in line. If it's kosher, that's fine.
She wants a hot dog for her roll!
She wants a hot dog for her roll!


[I have omitted some patter that appears in the recording. I have italicized the words sung by others than the main singer.

The above song is adapted from a comedy record by Butterbeans & Susie called "I Want a Hot Dog for My Roll" (1927) which you can hear at YouTube.