Julie, There isn't one of us who hasn't made some error at one time or another, so you are asking the right group for help. You found yourself stressed and under the strain of recent events. I am sorry about your loss and the children's. So here is a big {{{{{HUG}}}}}to let you know we care about you.Be kind to yourself, listen to some wonderful music; pick up a book with some inspirational thoughts; telephone a close friend, whatever it takes to get cheery.
Ellen