I can speak perfect French:

"Do 'ave a Dubonnet" (that dates me...)

Or even more French:

"Dubo Dubon Dubonnet"

My very first attempt at French, on my own aged 15 at a kiosk at the Gare du Nord, was completely successful:

"Vingt Royales et une boîte des allumettes, s'il vous plaît..." said I with quavering voice.

I got the fags and matches and, to my utter amazement, the bloke didn't even lift an eyebrow at my accent.