The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #31071   Message #3989629
Posted By: Jim Dixon
27-Apr-19 - 08:01 PM
Thread Name: Lyr Add: Never Mind (WWI parody + original)
Subject: Lyr Add: NEVER MIND (WWI parody)
From Tommy's Tunes: A Comprehensive Collection of Soldiers' Songs, Marching Melodies, [etc.] by Frederick Thomas Nettleingham (London: Erskine Macdonald, Ltd., 1917), page 28:

NEVER MIND.[1]
(New Version.)

Though your heart may ache awhile, never mind,
Though your heart may ache awhile, never mind,
You'll forget about it soon,
When you've had a good old spoon,
And your heart, it aches no more, never mind.

If the Sergeant's pinched your rum—never mind,
If the Sergeant's on the bum[2]—never mind.
If he collars all your fags,
And you've nothing on but rags,
It's his affair—not yours—so never mind.

If the Sergeant says you’re daft—never mind.
Maybe you are—who knows?—never mind.
It's no use to answer back,
'Cos he won't stand any slack,[3]
So if he says you're daft—then you are.

The following has reference to a certain R.F.C. sergeant, who went to fetch rations in a sidecar, the light tender usually employed for this purpose being otherwise engaged. Not being able to get it all in, he tied the bread round the side and back. When he arrived at the unit, not unnaturally the bread was “napoo.”[4]

At lunch-time you might have heard a serenade to the following effect:


If the Sergeant's lost your bread—never mind.
If he sticks it round a side car—never mind.
And even if it's messed—
He did it for the best,
For he's the Sergeant—dontcherknow—so never mind.

1. This song, with its many verses, shows Tommy as a confirmed fatalist.
2. On the borrow.
3. Cheek.
4. “Napoo"–Tommy's version of “Il n'y-a plus;” used in divers senses, usually to say: no more; not there; gone. Used in the same sense as Vamoosed.