But why not enjoy a swim off the beaches of our delightful Bristol Channel resorts...
Swimming with dolphins is nothing compared to swimming with condoms, tampons, and turds...

England, the land of History and mythology,
of idealised rural splendour,
of morris dance and maypoles,
loved by real patriots...
But a bit of a shitehole for everyone else awake to 21st Century reality...

Mind though.. morris and Boris does rhyme for any poetic minded deluded escapees of the here and now..