When you do make the break...and you will....be very careful about rebound relationships.
Your SO has seriously undermined your self confidence and self image, otherwise you would have given him his marching orders long ago, so, when you start developing relationships with men who respect and value you, it feels very much like love. It's not.
Enjoy the new feelings and relationships, DON'T enter into a long term relationship, specially one that involves washing socks, until at least 2 years after the divorce.
I'm in my third, very happy marriage, but the second was a mistake. So was the first, but for different reasons.
Cheers, Bron.
PS, Life is far too short to put up with people you don't like.