Thought this was as good as I've seen yet
Jim Carroll

Dom is Back in Durham (Song from a Northern Lass)
Our Dom is back in Durham, he’s away from all the hassle,
Though his eyesight’s failing, he can still see Barnard Castle.
An’ it’s great to have him hyem, we can shout across the hedge —
But the fact that he brought Covid, has us all here on edge.
Chorus
Yes it’s great to have ye yem — my wee bairn, bonny lad,
An yer business at the Castle will make your wee heart glad,
And you sister will be happy when you get that business done,
We’ll all be in the clover when the money boat comes hyem.
Oo he was gan propa radge when they spied him at Barnard,
That nebby bugga caught him — waved his small red card.
But he’ll bluff his way around it, of that I have no doubt
I’ve often told our Dominic, “Shy bairns, they get nowt”.
Never mind that lot in London, the press, those slimy cads,
They’ve got a down on Gordies and other Northern lads!
They’re just jealous of yer prowess, yer power, they can’t handle,
And to your wit and aptitude, they couldn’t hold a candle.
Chorus
Yes it’s great to have ye yem —an’ to see how well ye drive —
With the way yer eyes were looking, it’s a wonder yer alive!
Though you risked a lot in driving, we’re happy that you’ve come
And we’ll all be in the clover when the money boat comes hyem.
— © Frank Callery, May 26th 2020.