The Guardian style guide forbids the use of euphemistic shortenings or asterisks. The paper would want to see you saying fuck, cunt or bastard only in limited contexts, direct quotes for example. F*ck, c*nt and b*st*rd are unacceptable. Either say it like it is or find another word. I rather like things such as b*ast*ard. Cheers for the honest confession, Mrrzy! :-)