THE FLASH STOCKMAN
(Anon)

I'm a stockman to me trade and they call me Ugly Dave
I'm old and grey and only got one eye
In the yard I'm good, of course, but just put me on a horse
I'll go where lots of young 'uns daren't try

I've led 'em through the gidgee over country rough and ridgy
I'll loose them in the very worst of scrub
I can ride both rough and easy, with a brumby I'm a daisy
And a rightdown bobby-dazzler in a pub

Just watch me use the whip, I can give the dawdlers gyp
I can make the flamin' echoes roar and ring
With a branding-iron, well, I'm a perfect flamin' swell
In fact I'm duke of every blasted thing

To watch me skin a sheep, it's so perfect you could weep
I can act the silvertail as if my blood was blue
You could strike me pink or dead, if I stood upon me head
I'd be just as good as any other two

I've a notion in me pate that it's luck, it isn't fate
That I'm so far above the common run
So, in everything I do, you could cut me square in two
For I'm much two flamin' good to be in one

Youtube clip

--Stewie.