Re: capitalization. Is it in this thread that someone mentioned that one of the prominent style-guides recommends capitalizing 'black' but not 'white'? I'm not sure if that would be based on any kind of logic, or if it is simply indicating common usage. I recall years ago, Azizi pointing out that 'black' as an indicator of race should be capitalized - as, for instance, 'Caucasian' - and clearly it was what she as a Black person preferred, so since then I've made a point of capitalizing 'Black', which I hadn't been in the habit of. To be consistent, I often capitalize 'White' if I'm going to be using both terms - but sometimes you don't know how you're going to end up wording something, and if you end up only using the term 'White', capitalized, it comes off as chauvinistic - but it feels a bit precious to be going through what you wrote in some post on the internet and fussing over whether you capitalized or didn't some word or other. I think I ran into that situation earlier in this thread, and decided that as a w/White person, I couldn't care less if 'white' is capitalized or not, but if it's important to a lot of Black people that that term be capitalized, I only care enough to go ahead and capitalize it - it doesn't take much effort, after all.

I had a similar sort of realization back when we were being hectored about using generic male pronouns, but no one could agree what exactly we were supposed to replace them with (she/he? s/he?, etc.) - it occurred to me that I didn't feel my maleness was under threat, so just started using the feminine pronouns instead.