I posted the following in a 'parodies' thread back in 2004:

BATCHELOR'S SONG.
unattributed


When I was a Batchelor I lived in a tin with a hundred bright green peas
My grandmother said to keep from sin you must not part from these
But then one day the lid came off Horizons loomed in view
And a very obscene little brown baked bean said "I'm coming in with you".

I said to the little obscene baked bean I like your flipping sauce
To which she said "I'm very well bred Heinz 57 of course"
She wept, she cried, she damned near fried and said "What shall I do?
So I pulled her in the can just to save her from the pan and the threat of the Irish stew.

Now I am a Batchelor I live in a can with a hundred khaki peans
And when I clap my hands they march around the can singing we're a lot of in-betweens
Reminds me of the bad old days when I lived with my bright green brothers
Now I'm doing very nice just ignoring the advice given me by my grandmother.



Taken from the Bangor (N.Wales) Scout & Guide club songbook (pub March 1970)

NP