I live in a madhouse. I heard the bell for the bedroom (radio doorbell push next to dad’s bed) go at about 6am. Mum had got to dad before me so I left it until later to try to find out what the problem had been.

J. What did dad ring the bell for this morning?
Mum. He wanted some water. He turned over a few times and fell out of bed.
J. He fell out of bed???
Mum. No but he could have fallen out of bed. He reached for his cup.
J. Had I forgotten to put the table by the bed then?
Mum. No that was OK and he could reach the cup.
J. So what are you telling me?
Mum. You are confusing me.

A bit later…

J. Why did you ring the bell this morning?
Dad. I didn’t ring a bell and no bell sounded.
J. (after ringing the bell). I heard that bell early this morning.
Dad. I did that deliberately as I needed water.
J. Didn’t I leave you with the cup and table as you want them?
Dad. No that was fine but…
        (he then goes into a lengthy explanation of hot and cold water in the bathroom and Mike         giving him his morning wash)
J. So how does this concern you needing water early in the morning when you are in bed.
Dad. I don’t know.