Here, you poor frozen ladies -- let me put my lemonade down, remove my sandals, and offer some poor measure of heartfelt consolation to those of you who, lured by the baubles of culture, hypnotized by mere literacy, or mayhap enthralled by the dumb magic of deciduous forests, have opted to spend a third of your year practicing for the next Ice Age:

BLOW, blow, thou winter wind,
  Thou art not so unkind
 As man's ingratitude;
 Thy tooth is not so keen,
Because thou art not seen,
Although thy breath be rude.
 
 Heigh ho! sing, heigh ho! unto the green holly:
Most friendship is feigning, most loving mere folly:
 Then heigh ho, the holly!
This life is most jolly.
 
 
Freeze, freeze, thou bitter sky,
That dost not bite so nigh
As benefits forgot:
Though thou the waters warp,
 Thy sting is not so sharp
As friend remember'd not.
 
 Heigh ho! sing, heigh ho! unto the green holly:
Most friendship is feigning, most loving mere folly:
Then heigh ho, the holly!
This life is most jolly,
For them as has lolly.

Warmest regards,

A