There was a young man from Belgrave
Who found a dead whore in a cave
He said "It's disgusting
But it only needs dusting"
And think of the money I'll save"

There was a young man from Peel Green
Who invented a wanking machine
On the 99th stroke
The fucking thing broke
And whipped his poor bollocks to cream

Now we have sunk to rock bottom, we can only gety better :-D