I've never watched Star Wars and I know nothing about it whatsoever. The other week I did accidentally watch that film with the huge spidery things with snakey arms that eventually died after throwing up out of their spaceship. I think it had Tom Cruise in it, a man about whom I know nothing. I've never watched a single minute of East Enders or the now-defunct Neighbours. I watched Star Trek a lot, and Doctor Who when I was little. This post contains no braggadocio.