The old maid sat by the fah-yer
She pulled her skirts up hah-yer,
And left her ---- all bah-yer.
The old tom cat was thah-yer,
He saw that --- all bah-yer,
He gave a jump, and he grabbed that ----,
And he pulled like Hell at the hah-yer!
And now, old maid, take cah-yer,
Let not your ---- go bah-yer,
Or the old tom cat will grab that ----
And pull like Hell at the hah-yer!

"From a half crazy hostler in a livery stable in
Newtonville, spring of 1897. He had more, maybe I can
recall some later."

Charles E. Roe

Text #2561 in the Gordon Inferno Collection. The expurgation is in the original.

See online here:

https://archive.org/details/1917gordoninfernocollection/page/n147/mode/2up?q=maid



The tune used by Charlie Nobile is is "In and Out the Windows" and, yes, this is the same tune that is used for "The Good Ship Venus".