From: Steve Shaw - PM
Date: 07 Jun 23 - 06:20 AM

Stop talking rubbish and tell us a joke

Stop jokes...
My wife says if I don’t stop making puns about Russia, she’s going to hit me.
If that’s the way it’s going to be, then Soviet.

How old Mildred stopped gossiping:
Mildred was the church gossip and self-appointed monitor of the church's morals. She kept sticking her nose into other people's business, even if several members did not approve of her extra-curricular activities. However, they feared her enough to maintain their silence.

Once, she accused a new member, Frank, of being an alcoholic after she saw his old pickup parked in front of the town's only bar one afternoon.

She emphatically told Frank (and several others) that everyone seeing it there would know what he was doing!

Frank, was a man of few words. He stared at her for a moment and just turned and walked away. He didn't explain, defend, or deny. He said nothing and just went away.

Later that evening, Frank quietly parked his old pickup in front of Mildred's house ...

Got out and simply walked home...

And left his old pickup there all night.

My wife asked if I could stop singing ‘Wonderwall’
I said maybe

A dyslexic boy is on his way home from training with his mam...."Can we stop at McDonald's mam? I'm starving" the boy asks. "If you can spell McDonald's we will stop on the way home ofcourse son" The boy pauses, composes himself and begins "M" "C" He begins to struggle....
"Ah fuck it mam let's have a KCF"


To surprise her hubby, an executive's wife stopped by his office.
When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap.

Without hesitating, he dictated, "And in conclusion, gents, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair.