99 Reasons Guitars Are Better Than Girlfriends-

1. Only expensive once.

You mean the first time you buy one? What about all the other guitars you then buy? Do they not count?

2. If they come unstrung, it only takes a few minutes to fix them.

I've known a LOT of "unstrung" guys, too. Guitars, no matter how beautiful, aren't human. That could be good or bad...

3. Any dischord in the relationship can be fixed with tuning forks.

Any dischord in the relationship can be fixed with communication and personal space. The romance might not be fixable, but the relationship can be.

4. Don't mind if you hang out with an old one for a while.

Define "hang out"

5. Willing to cuddle whenever you are.

I usually am willing to cuddle with my sweetie, anytime! *g*

6. Don't care if you forget when you got them.

Hmmm, I forgot when I "got" my guy! OHNO!

7. Can keep many at a time, with no problems.

Hmmm, if you really want more than one, then that is a definite advantage for the guitars...

8. Always love your taste in music.

So? Difference is the spice of life.

9. There's books on how they work.

There are books on how girls work, too. There are books on any subject.

10. Don't ask if they look fat.

Yeah, it's annoying when girls do that, for sure. I don't.

11. Become more valuable physically as they age.

Certain cultures respect older women, and see each wrinkle as added value. Sucks that you don't live in one of those cultures.

12. Always have good character.

??? I've met some pretty crappy guitars.

Well, there's twelve. Need some help on the next 87. Any takers?

Sorry to be so serious, but I think there are definite logical flaws in your original post.

~*sirepseh*~