A Russian and his wife were listening to the radio when the weather forecast came. The announcer said that tomorrow would be fine with long sunny periods. The Russian gets up opens the door and looks out. He comes back and says to his wife, "that forecaster is wrong, it'll be wet tomorrow." His wife says in surprise, "How do you know?" The Russian just looks at her and says, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear." Gawd help me, I wanted to tell this for years.