Gervase, how the !@#$ are you? I nearly wet myself imagining someone eating a "bowl of fishy snot".

I have a few questions about your post, however, to whit: What is it "to bab"?
What is a "three-ply hairy wool"?
What is a hessian sack?

And, last but not least, how does the dyke feel about having a ball dangled in her?

curious in DC Chance

ps drunk any olive oil lately?