I just can't believe that you 'old time' 'Catters haven't told English Jon about this song and the wonderful, classic BS: Cat Farts thread:

CAT FARTS
(Tune: How Much Is That Doggie In The Window)

Chorus:
How much is that kitten in the window,
The one with the odorous bum.
The aroma is one that we should know,
Reminds me of green river scum.

His eyes are the colour of emeralds,
His toothies they shine in the sun,
I would love to hug him and kiss him,
If his butt didn't smell like bad rum.

(Chorus)

He mews as I scratch his ears and hold him,
He nuzzles my cheek with a purr,
He raises his tail in greatest pleasure,
Too bad that his end has no fur!

(Chorus)

The man says there'll be no charge for him, dear
He's free to the first true good home,
But beware of his little SBD's, dear,
He could part the Red Sea with no comb!

(Chorus)

-- Áine