A Scotsman, Italian and Irishman are all having a good time and agree that the bar is a nice place.

Then the Scotsman says; "Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, back in Glasgee, there's a better one.
At MacDougal's, you buy a drink,then you buy another drink, then MacDougal himself will buy you your third drink!"

The others agree that sounds like a good place.

But then the Italian says, "Yeah, dat's sounds like a nice bar, but where I come from, dere's an even better one.
Over in Brooklyn, dere's this place called Vinny's. At Vinny's, you buy a drink, Vinny buys you a drink. You >buy anudda drink, Vinny buys you anudda drink.

Everyone agrees that sounds like a great bar.

Then the Irishman says, "You tink dat's great? Where Oi come from in Dublin, dere's dis bar dat's even better called Morphy's.
At Morphy's, dey buy you your first drink, then dey buy you your second drink, then dey buy you your thurd drink, and den, dey buy you your fourth drink, then they take you in de back, and get you laid!"

Wow!" say the other two. "That's fantastic! Did this actually happen to you?"
"No," replies the Irish guy, "but it happened to me sister."