The water in Orillia is always tainted. This is probably due to the fact that my good friend, Johhny Death insists on pissing in the Lake on a regular basis. DON'T drink tap water in Orillia!

As for you, Carol...

I want to share with you a very deep concern I have about CarolC. But first, let me pose you a question: Is CarolC actually concerned about any of us, or does she just want to feed us a diet of robbery, murder, violence, and all other manner of trials and tribulations? After reading this letter, you'll indisputably find it's the latter. I cannot compromise with her; she is without principles. I cannot reason with her; she is without reason. But I can warn her, and with a warning she must undoubtedly take to heart: I am intellectually honest enough to admit my own previous ignorance in that matter. I only wish that she had the same intellectual honesty. Look at what's happened since CarolC first ordered her shock troops to view countries and the people that live in them either as economic targets to be exploited or as military targets to be defeated: Views once considered resentful are now considered ordinary. Views once considered wrongheaded are now considered perfectly normal. And the most shameless of CarolC's views are now seen as gospel by legions of the worst sorts of yellow-bellied superstitious-types there are.

This raises the question: What meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma is she going through now? Well, I asked the question, so I should answer it. Let me start by saying that she reports the news selectively in order to advance her agenda. Now, I could go off on that point alone, but she has certainly never given evidence of thinking extensively. Or at all, for that matter. Insipid protestors who inspire a recrudescence of surly fatuity might not recognize the incongruities in CarolC's reinterpretations of historic events, but if the human race is to survive on this planet, we will have to take action. Be forewarned: If CarolC thinks her refrains represent progress, she should rethink her definition of progress. As a matter of fact, the space remaining in this letter will not suffice even to enumerate the ways in which she has tried to agitate for indoctrination programs in local schools.

CarolC can't see the forest for the trees. But even if we disregard all that and examine only CarolC's slatternly, obstinate claims, this seems to me to be enough to show that if CarolC is going to caricature and stereotype people from other cultures, then she should at least have the self-respect to remind herself of a few things: First, I, hardheaded cynic that I am, maintain that she is completely full of it. And second, we must shake off our torpor, ignore the siren songs of ethnocentrism, and give peace a chance. Now, that's a strong conclusion to draw just from the evidence I've presented in this letter. So let me corroborate it by saying that those of us who are too lazy or disinterested to present a clear picture of what is happening, what has happened, and what is likely to happen in the future have no right to complain when she and her stooges distract people from serious analysis of the situation. CarolC may have the right to glorify the things that everyone else execrates. She may have the right to break up society's solidarity and cohesiveness. But CarolC crosses the line when she uses her bully pulpit to increase people's stress and aggression. One final point: This is a very real and serious concern.

Beauty, eh? :-) I wonder what it would look like translated into Italian, then into Russian, and then back into English?

- LH