Timmy's Story [Musical Content Rating: Low]

Timmy was more or less foisted on me by my then girlfriend C. She herself kept five cats; occasionally as many as six or seven, or as few as two or three, depending on numbers of strays arriving or leaving, and on local traffic conditions. She felt I ought to have at least one cat as well, so a serial strayer by the name of Timmy duly arrived. He was a three year old ginger tom who had run away from three or four good homes already

In order to settle him C thought it would be a good idea to keep him locked in the house for a while. After a few weeks in which Timmy shredded my wallpaper, ripped my curtains, defecated in my bathtub (and sometimes in his litter tray), I let him out. He shot up a tree and became stuck. In rescuing him he gouged large chunks of flesh from both hands and my face. Curiously he seemed to feel that this created a blood bond between us, since he decided to stay. I installed a cat flap the next day.

During this period C and I retained our separate homes, as I drew the line at sharing my life with a caterwaul of cats. We also had differing musical tastes; she was not mesmerised by my LPs "of old crones screeching in Gaelic", and I was unable to share in her adulation of Freddie Mercury. Consequently we did not spend much time listening to music together, and I rather lost my own interest in folk music. Later our differences, musical and otherwise, became so strong that we were left with nothing to talk about, and we drifted apart. The last time I went to see her she had added a large German shepherd dog to her menagerie, and he, playfully, but still painfully, chewed on my testicles. We have not met since.

Timmy however remained. I acquired a CD player, and lots of goodies from Topic, and tons of Irish albums. It was noticeable that Timmy was not a trad lover, and he spent less and less time at home. Finally when I started playing Mary MacNamara's music to him he had had enough, and stalked off.

I discovered that he had planned his departure well, and had settled in two or three separate new homes, which were warm, comfortable, and quiet. He still drops by for a visit from time to time, checks to see whether I still have my CD player, and then returns to one or other of his homes.