First Kendall, I'd tell him that he should have a thorough physical and consult with his doctor before going the Viagra route. Then, I'd suggest that he hold back on the marketing of the Fans until Spring or early Summer. Next, I'd suggest he post a picture of himself on his website using the Amish-Australian Pitchfork Moustache Tuner. This would have a positive impact on sales. Also suggest he do something to make the songbook more marketable so it just doesn't go "flop" but instead actually plays some tunes or has a video game included, or something.

Finally, I'd explain that this thread, by one means or another, has remained in the top half of the daily thread list for TEN DAYS now and it is getting the maximum exposure it can be given, which has resulted in several committed orders. (:<))

Spaw