Mary had a litle pig
And it was always grunting.
She tied it to a five-bar gate
And kicked its little head in

Dinah, Dinah, show us your leg,
A yard above your knee..

...One red one, one white one,
And one with a bit of shite on,
And the hairs on her dickey-di do
Came down to her knee...


Bloody hell, those came back wafting back down the back passage of my memory like a bad smell!
Micca's right, though - the Opies are the best starting-off point for anything like this.