Triage? OK......LOLNow Mary, it's true, I'm an "Ahian" born and bred and though I lived a lot of other places for about 10 years, something...gawd knows what....made me come home! So let me answer your statements:
YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM OHIO IF:
You've never met any celebrities. Damn few
Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.Or an Amish buggy....except of course in "Barrel Season" when things pack up even more.
"Vacation" means driving through Hocking Hills or going to King's Island. King's Island...because I LIVE in the Hocking Hills!
You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular. Hey now...We went to see Tom Petty.....hmmm, yeah, well....
You measure distance in minutes.There's another way?
Down south to you means Kentucky. True....Kentucky is where they teach the 3 R's as Readin, Ritin, and Route 23 to Ohio.
You know several people who have hit a deer. I'll bet I know two dozen!
Your school classes were cancelled because of cold. Yeah
Your school classes were canceled because of heat. What's your point?
You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way.My son Tristan still does!
You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.About two weeks ago was the last time as a matter of fact.
You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."Only if you're a farmer....and we got a lot of those
You know what's knee-high by the Fourth of July. Well, it used to be corn, but it's going nuts anymore and even the soybeans are knee high now
Stores don't have bags; they have sacks.Why would you put your groceries in a suitcase?
You see people wear bib overalls at funerals. Yep
You see a car running in the parking lot at the store with no one in it no matter what time of the year. Generally, it's my van, along with about 50 others
You end your sentences with an unnecessary preposition. Example: "Where's my coat at?" or "If you go to the mall I wanna go with." Some point you're coming to?
All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, or grain. And we have about 150 of them....although we used to have one town that had an underwear fest, and Dennison still has a Clay Festival
You install security locks on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.Hardly anyone locks there doors in my little village...truth!
You think of the major four food groups as beef, pork, beer, and Jell-O salad with marshmallows. And the green jello with carrots and celery on top with a blob of miracle whip, just to be festive
You carry jumper cables in your car. You don't?
You know what "cow tipping" or "Possum Kicking" is. So what's wrong with alternative sports?
You only own 3 spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup. Hey now...
You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit. Or a swimsuit....around here you never know.
Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.You betcher ass!
You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.And is a worse driver
You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie. Karen sure looks good to me
The local paper covers national and international headlines on one page but requires 6 pages for sports. GO BUCKS!!!
You think that deer season is a national holiday.It isn't? I need to check on this....
You know which leaves make good toilet paper. Maple....and you learn to ID poison ivy at an early age.
You find -20 degrees F "a little chilly". A bit brisk, I suppose
You know all 4 seasons: Almost Winter, Winter, Still Winter, and Construction. I don't get it. Isn't that right?
You know what a real buckeye is, and have a recipe for candy ones. Damn straight...and they beat the hell out of a Reese Cup!
You know if another Ohioian is from southern, middle or northern Ohio as soon as they open their mouth.True
You can spell words like Cuyahoga and Tuscarawas. Hey Mary, I was BORN in Tuscarawas county!
You know that Serpent Mound was not made by snakes.Injuns...a lot of them used to be here but the Amish ran them off.
You actually get these jokes and forward them to all your Ohio friends. ...and I will.
Spaw